The Five People You Meet in Hell: An Unauthorized Parody

Heaven can wait.In the meantime…why not go to Hell?Every once in a while a little book comes along that sheds light on our desire for intimacy, our determination to grow spiritually, and our collective yearning to define the boundaries of the soul.The Five People You Meet in Hell is not that little book.A sensitive everyman, Edgy works a meaning-less job at a seaside tourist trap. When a freak accident sends him to “the other side,” he encounters a series of strangers compelled to explain the meaning of life. Running the gamut from annoying and incoherent to irritating and hard to follow, these individuals all share a basic desire with virtually every other soul in the universe: to make quick money from a made-for-television movie.The Five People You Meet in Hell is as illuminating as a short-circuited night light and contains all the insight of a chocolate-dipped fortune cookie (with none of the fat). If you’ve ever died, expect to die, know someone who has died, raise alpacas, collect Hummel figurines, breathe air, or enjoy line dancing, you must buy this book. You will never think about thirteen bucks the same way again.If you experience erections lasting more than four hours, please consult your physician.